The Importance of Family

Family. It's a simple, special, meaningful word. It encompasses all the feelings and people that make your life what it is. Your family could include everyone from your immediate relatives to close friends and of course significant others. However your family is made up, they are important. Your family is the structure that will always support you. You need family.

  

My dad has always been my number 1. He was a single father who tried his hardest to ensure that I would grow up to be a strong, independent woman. I like to think that I am. I can build a shelf without asking for help. I can use power tools. But he also taught me to never be afraid to ask questions. There's no shame in needing help. He has always been my biggest fan and best friend. 

When I danced in middle school and high school, even before that when I danced at a studio, he never missed a performance. He was always there, with his camera of course. He made sure that I was at every practice or class and that I worked even harder outside of that to better myself. He believed in me. 

He instilled in me that my education was the most important thing that I could possess. It was something that no one could ever take away from me. I changed my major 5 times, and each time he said that I could do it and would succeed. He didn't care where I got my degree, or what I got it in, as long as I got it. He put the power of knowledge inside me and everyday I continue to learn. From him I also got my work ethic. I bust my butt at every job that I do. I refuse to "half ass" anything. When I start something, I do it right and I do it big.  

Briam. My love. If you read my little confession about our "half"iversary, then you know how much this man means to me. He loves me unconditionally and I wouldn't change him for the world. He is my rock. My soulmate. Something that I've always held very important is that my partner be liked and accepted by my parents. Thankfully, he is. Briam and my dad joke all the time. The plot little schemes against my stepmom and I. They're trouble makers. But we love them. Briam opens up a whole new world for me. Being that he's from Puerto Rico, I get to experience a completely different culture compared to my own. I've tried learning Spanish, took it for 2 years at FSU. Still can't say more that 20 words. I tried.

Now because my stepmom doesn't like pictures, here are the flowers I brought her yesterday at the family BBQ. Pretty, right? Just like her. We've had our differences. And boy have some of them been huge. But what matters is that I've been able to grow and mature over the past 7 years and have come to love respect her as not only my dad's wife, but as a strong mother figure in my life. She has come to be one of my dearest friends and someone that I can always call to talk to. She understands how to handle my moods and rollercoaster emotions. She knows that I have a good heart and helps me grow into a better person each day. 

My mom passed away when I was 16. But my relationship with her was long gone before that. When my parents got divorced, I was about 4 years old, my mom decided that if she couldn't have me to herself, then she didn't want me in her life at all. She got into a bad life of drugs, bad boyfriends, and an unhealthy way of living. She smoked at least 1 pack of cigarettes a day and rarely ate. She did at around 90lbs. She was so peaceful, just laying there.

When I got the call that she had passed away, the woman on the other end of the line decided that it was my fault that my mom was dead. That she died of a broken heart and I caused it. A part of my soul died that day. How does one recover from being told that you killed your mom? That if I was there for her then she would've kept fighting? 

When we had to clean out my mom's trailer, I saw a giant picture of me when I was a baby hanging on her living room wall. She loved me. She just knew that she could never be the mom that I needed her to be. I have yet to figure out what's more painful, losing someone you've spent your whole life knowing and loving or losing someone who was never there. I have so many questions that will go unanswered. I will never get to hear her say that she really did care for me. She brought me into this world, and for that, I'm grateful. 

I've always wanted a sister. Someone that I could talk to, well, just because. K is a great person and a great stepsister. She is doing so much good in the world. She has such a deep and caring heart. We, too, have had many ups and downs in our relationship. But I think that we've both come to a point where we can love each other for who we both are. She's a beautiful soul, inside and out. I couldn't ask for a more unique, special, and loving sister. She's taught me to be a nonjudgemental person. You have no right to judge someone when you don't know their story. She's made me a better person. 

Supporting each other is something that just comes naturally in my family. If there's a goal that we have or a project we're working on, we do whatever we can to help each other. Whether it's losing weight or accomplishing a life's dream, we go 110%. 

My dad loves NASCAR. He loves adrenaline. He's a rush junkie. Watching him get to live one of his dreams by driving at the Homestead Speedway in Miami was amazing. It was one of the happiest days of his life. He's been through so much that he deserved every second of happiness. 

And that's what we do. We make each other happy. 

Now I don't know about you, but my animals are a huge part of my family. My dad's cat, Baby, is a giant fat ball of love. She loves my dad so much. And now, I'm pretty sure she thinks Briam is her boyfriend. I'm trying to convince my parents to put her on a diet because she seriously takes up 3 sqft tiles on the living room floor. 

And then there's my cat. Well she was Briam's cat but then I moved in and claimed her as my own. I call her Kitty, but his parents call her Gorda. Even though she only weighs 6 pounds. My dad's cat is the real Gorda. 

I love Kitty. She's pretty old. Briam thinks she's 16 or 17. And she's had a large amount of health problems. She's had worms, her ear bit open, a stomach infection, and hypothyroidism. She's cost us an arm and a leg, but she's worth every penny. I don't know what I'm going to do when she's gone. She's pivotal part in all of our lives. 

Don't let her cuteness or size fool you, she can be quite the terror. And she's an attention hog. God forbid you be doing anything but paying attention to her. She loves belly rubs. If she's not napping or eating, you better be giving her a belly rub. 

I enjoy dressing her up. And taking her for walks on her leash. She doesn't like any of it. In fact, I'm pretty sure she hates it. But she still loves me.

And that's the main lesson. Regardless of what you go through in your own life, or within your family, you must always love each other. Love heals everything. If your love is true, then the problems will work itself out. My family is proof of that. Our love and support for each other will never die.