Motivational Monday: Trust Your Journey

This is something that I have to remind myself everyday. It's hard when you see your goals and they feel so very far away. I know I've talked about understanding your happiness and following your dreams and what not, but that can get really hard sometimes. I find myself having to step back, take a deep breath, and continue moving forward. I have to trust my journey. My step-mom likes to say, "It's not your time." Eh, moms always know best, right? 

Most recently, and my step-mom unintentionally laughs every time I freak out, a large amount of people I know have been getting engaged and/or married. And every time I see a status on Facebook or a post on Instagram, I lose my shit. And I don't mean to be profane, but I really don't know how else to describe it. I seriously just lose it. Best example, and God bless Briam for handling my "moments" with stride, I saw on IG today a post about a Maid of Honor proposal and how that date had already been set, despite getting engaged like 3 weeks ago. And the month, October, has been my month for ever, as long as I can remember. I legit lost it about this girl planning her wedding in October, MY MONTH. Poor Briam just looks over at me and says, "November is nice too! October is scary, with Halloween and all. November is about being thankful. That's better for our wedding." Bless him. Bless him so much. 

I told this story to my step-mom and she just laughed. Because she knows that I'm not losing it in a "jealous, crazy, psycho" way, but in a "Why isn't it my time?" way. 

So the whole point of this post is that if there is something in your life that you really want, but aren't receiving, then it's not your time. We don't always remember that God has an exact plan for how our lives are going to turn out. And of course He's not going to lead you in the wrong direction. So just know that it's not your time. You will have what you want one day, and if it doesn't happen, God will provide you with the peace to accept that. You'll never be left hanging. 

Trust your journey. 

When Life Happens

I'm sure you guys have noticed that my posts on this blog, and my other two, have temporarily stopped. I like to be very open and honest about what's going on in my life, so here it is. This is why the postings have stopped right now. 

I'm playing nurse to my boyfriend, Briam. 

On Friday, August 2nd, Briam went in for surgery. He had torn his labrum extensively and has cartilage damage in his right shoulder. So basically all last week I had been taking him to pre-op appointments, getting everything at the house ready, working, and finally taking him to surgery. 

The surgery was only supposed to last 1 hour. It took over 2. I was a hot mess of anxiety thinking that the worst had happened. When the doctor finally came out to talk to me, he told me that the damage was much worse than what the MRI had shown. Which Briam already expected that. I didn't. 

I've been an emotional wreck too. I've cried at least once everyday since Tuesday. I love Briam more than anything to see him hurt breaks my heart. Add that on top of the fact that Briam won't be able to work for almost 3 months, I have had to get a 2nd job, still being a college student, taking care of bills, wanting to continue with my 3 blogs, making sure that all appointments are scheduled and booked, and then adding normal housework on top of that. I'm legit a hot mess. 

But it's all worth it. Briam will get better. His shoulder will heal and he will no longer have as much pain as he did before. And our relationship will grow stronger because I have been and will continue to be right beside him every step of the way. 

But now that the worst is over, I plan to get back on track with my posts this week. I'm sitting down as I write this to start planning out my week! 

Talk to you guys soon!